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I am a writer of dark magical realism. All that is visible but rarely seen, all that is real but seems surreal, all that is dark yet radiates light.

Thursday, September 23, 2010


I haven't updated in a minute.  I've been all tangled up in my boo.  Boo is a term I got from my sister to describe the midway point between jump off and boyfriend.  It's the modern version of the antiquated term lover.  I like having a boo.  It's comfortable and cozy.  All the benefits of a friend, without the official boyfriend title.  I don't like titles.  As soon as you place a label on something, as it attempts to define, it stunts and confines.  Titles are words.  Words are symbols and signs.  Meaningless in utterance, it's the heart that evokes them.

The term boo is cute and whimsical, just like we are.  No expectations, no obligations, everything is free flowing. And boy is it flowing.  Flowing so much, I feel when we get together--we stopped the world and we got off.  And left y'all there while we just do us.  I'm in the world right now and I can't take it.  Everything is in black and white, devoid of color.  I had to take a minute.  For though the magic of you is not with me; I am attempting to recreate it.

Boo, go to sleep tonight and dream us rich!  Just give me an idea: plant the seed and I'll be sure to make sure it germinates.  I'm waiting!

Sunday, September 12, 2010


A friend sent me this text. I've transcribed it verbatim:

They brag to their peers oh how romantic sincere. They've been waiting praying for years. Here I appear. Calm their fears, whatever they say I hear. Gain their trust, to their heart I am near. Saying I love you too, begrudgingly with a sneer. Not after pussy, their mind I want to steer. Control and power has given me more of an erection for years. Cold and heartless immune to their tears. Sobbing, begging, asking why. I thought you weren't like other guys. No bitch I'm worse; I'm the devil in disguise.

My friend is an interesting guy. For as long as I've known him, he has always been infatuated with some woman. I have quite a few e-mails from him proclaiming various women as "the one".  And just as quickly as these relationships began, they ended. When I would call him and ask, "What happened?" Through the phone, I could imagine his shrug.  The woman had been discarded like a used tissue. His attitude: who cares.

I would feel sorry for the women. If you've ever read the "Art of Seduction", he fits the profile of the ideal lover.

Men like him are hard to spot. Because unlike a garden variety sociopath (that's how your text message read), when he tells these women how great they are, at the time he believes it.  It's hard to spot a liar when they aren't lying.  It's hard to spot a fraud when they are not being fake.  The sincerity they felt; it was real--for that moment.

I recently met this guy. And if you have been reading, it has gotten hot very quickly. I clicked with this guy because he felt so sincere. His words soothed any fears. He is easy to trust. Hmmm. So my body will keep going along for the ride (it's a really good one!).  But my mind will remain skeptic.  And my heart? I am keeping it tucked away in a safe place at home. I don't want to fall victim to an emotional terrorist.

Thanks for the reminder, friend. `

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


This post is part of a September Blog Chain for absolutewrite.com. The topic is seasons.

Check out these fresh blogs from my fellow writers:
Ralph_Pines: http://ralfast.wordpress.com/
Aheïla: http://thewriteaholicblog.wordpress.com/
DavidZahir: http://zahirblue.blogspot.com/
orion_mk3: http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com/
semmie: http://semmie.wordpress.com/
llalah: http://www.twylanonsequitur.blogspot.com/
hillaryjacques: http://www.hillaryjacques.blogspot.com/
AuburnAssassin: http://clairegillian.wordpress.com/
laffarsmith: http://www.craftingfiction.com/
sbclark: http://www.sonyaclark.net/
FreshHell: http://freshhell.wordpress.com/
PASeasholtz: http://www.paseasholtz.com/
SF4-EVER: http://www.ulbrichalmazan.blogspot.com/
T.N. Tobias: http://tnt-tek.com/
IrishAnnie: http://superpenpower.blogspot.com
Proach: http://desstories.blogspot.com/
mada: http://questioningseeking.blogspot.com/

And here we go:

Now, I know I promised a post about sex: something hard and wet just like we get. But I'm feeling philosophical and a tad poetic. So instead I'll deliver this aside. As the summer is over and fall begins, I ask myself this question: are you for a season, a reason or a lifetime? I loved the heat of the summer. Little clothes, sexing under your air conditioner, making it hot on the bed while the room was ice cold. We were just like the summer: blazing and bold. Behind the closed door of your bedroom, time stood still, nothing existed but my love and your will. Right now we are an idyllic dream: adults living a teenage reality. Dreams end when we wake up, will we end now that the summer is up? Was this just for a season? Or is there a reason? I don't know. I can't even begin to think about a lifetime.

We had it good in the summer. I wonder how we'll do in the fall? Will we change when the leaves change? Will we cool down with the weather? Nah, I don't think so. I can already feel our lust turning into trust. We're moving quickly. No time to think which is good for me: I think too much. And I'm still trying to locate my heart, so I'll go with this hunch. You're for a reason. I might not understand it now; but baby, you're needed. It's not just about desire; you open me up and inspire.

So now that I know there is a reason, let's go back to the seasons. The fall is cool. I like the fashion. But it's still lacking the summer passion. Usually, I don't like the winter. I can't deal with the snow, the ice, and the thick clothes when it gets brick. But then I heat up thinking about spending the winter under the covers with your...stick. Springtime in New York City is mostly an extension of winter. March is the same as February--forget April showers, I don't like it when it rains. The only good month is May. It starts to warm up and on the nineteenth it's my birthday. Fall, winter, spring, they are okay but I love the summer. It's the season I met you. I can't wait for next August on the 22nd. That's when we can play, "Do you know what today is? It's our anniversary." Remember that song? If we keep going the way we're going, we'll never go wrong. Here's the plan: we'll cruise through fall, stay under the covers during the winter, keep our fling going through spring, until we come full circle back to the summer. By then we'd have made it through all seasons, fulfilled our reason, and maybe we can start working on our lifetime. Lifetime? Chill. You should be home from work soon. Hurry up and call, it's our time.

Sunday, September 5, 2010


Beware of people who constantly preach forgiveness. They will harm you intentionally and then try to manipulate you for the express purpose of holding you to standards; they do not hold for themselves. I know how to behave and if I harm you; it is deliberate and I am out to destroy you. Best believe, they are too. Unless they are a young child, or an animal; they know right from wrong. They just don't care enough about you to treat you with respect; they don't feel you are worthy. Reciprocate the action and see how forgiving they are of you.

Why do you hold them to such high regard and think so lowly of yourself? My energy is precious; it will be only extended to those who can replenish, no forgiveness. You are expendable.

Thursday, September 2, 2010


Oh yea just because the symbol isn't there please be aware that's everything I've written is protected by copyright. Not just by the law of the land but by the energy of the spirit. Copy my shit if you dare but please be aware your whole family is hexed. Go buy some black clothes, and funeral plots and prepare for their imminent death. You don't believe me? You don't have to. I do, you are about to witness the power of my voodoo.


The most defining day of my life started out pretty unremarkable.  I had always dreamed about this day; I had created images of where it would happen, what I would wear and how I would have styled my hair.  It would happen at a restaurant; I would be waiting for my friend and you would be appear; my hair would be down and flowing, blown out straight. My outfit would be impeccable:  stylish and conservative yet still form fitting.  I knew just how you would be too.  I had imagined how you would look.  You would be tall, good looking, with an easy going smile and a workout physique.  Our attraction would be apparent at first sight, we both wouldn’t show it but we would feel it.  We’d give each other sheepish grins while trying to play it cool. You would fumble a little while you asked for my number and I would think it was cute.  We would be around the same age, you’d probably be a few years older, and I liked them older.  You would be well established: finished school, nice apartment, thriving career.  You would be everything I had ever wanted in a man and more.   And you were.  But it didn’t happen quite like that instead it happened like this.


Now I know you said you prefer ones that rhyme and talk about sex, but not today. I agree, the remix was crazy.  We'll have to work hard to top that one.  My flow is not fabricated, it comes from momentum. But I don't know: I like the times we just chill and and take it easy. There is nothing more to prove, we are in our groove.  When we feel up to it, we'll make a power move.  No pressure, every time is still a treasure.

But maybe tomorrow I'll talk about what we did last night.  I'll make it rhyme for you and it'll be tight.  But right now, I just want to say that you made my day and someone else's too.  For real, it's true.  You are powerful, full of love (spiritual energy) and everything else you say you're not.  All that self doubt needs to stop.  Let me tell you what you did.  You stopped me from beating a bitch down at Starbucks and instead of getting arrested, I made a new friend.

Here is what happened: I went to the cafe to get an iced coffee, send out resumes, write a little and beat the heat.  My laptop battery was low and so is the one on my cell phone.  I forgot my phone charger by the way, I probably left it under your bed.  So if you hit me and I don't answer, I'm not ignoring you--my phone is dead.  Back to the story:  I took a seat near an outlet.  It had a magazine covering it. I put the magazine on the table next to me and just before I was going to get settled in; I noticed on the table a mostly finished drink.   I changed chairs and waited to see if someone would reclaim it.  I thought to put the magazine back on the chair but before I did, someone appeared.  It was an angry looking woman dressed in full fall gear. She had a black jacket on in this hot weather, so I knew from the outset--she wasn't all the way there.  She sat down and asked loudly, "Who the fuck touched my shit?"  Not to anyone in particular, but I knew what I did.  I apologized and said it was me.  I explained, "I didn't mean to touch your belongings.  I didn't know it was your seat."  She didn't let it go.  She said to me, "Why the hell did you do that for?"  Now just a few weeks ago I would have gotten tight.  I already apologized, so she must have wanted to fight.  Instead of escalating the aggression, I explained myself again and asked her about her day.  She was taken aback by my question and confessed everything in her life was going horrible.  I sympathized with her and offered her blessings and told her: hold on, things will get more tolerable.  She accepted what I said and her attitude immediately changed.  It went from having a dark cloud over her head to matching the bright sun of the day. She apologized for her overreaction.  I told her, "It's okay, bad days happen."  We made a little small talk and I advised her to look up mercury in retrograde.  When she left, she offered me the chair.  And when someone tried to slip into it before I got up; she told them, "Sorry, I was saving it for her, my friend."

Isn't that a nice story.  And it was all because of you.  Your spiritual energy shined through me and onto her.  You are powerful.   In the presence of negativity, your love is mitigating.  You affect positive change.  And like that woman, the tide will change for you too.  It is already: you will soon get everything that was taken from you times 100,002. Everything will be stupendous to suggest anything else would be utterly preposterous. :-)

Your love is coming, open up and embrace it, keep it flowing...


Wednesday, September 1, 2010


My good friend/bro in law, the aptly named Godhead the General, is a trailblazer in the underground hip hop scene.  I went to a couple of ciphers years ago and though I enjoyed them, it wasn't really my thing.  My sis called me a chicken head and I was like okay, "cheep, cheep."  She asked what happened to me.  I used to be like her, a real head.  But scouring college radios and hanging around the underground looking for real hip hop was no longer a priority for me like it was back in the day.  I no longer lived and breathed it, I just consumed it; therefore I would take what I could get.  I was in the mental state of who cares about the lyrics just give me a hot beat--something to shake my ass, I'm not trying to learn, for that I'll sit in class.  Boy, was I ignorant and my life reflected it: no substance, all image. 

Now this was about five or so years ago and while mainstream hip hop back then was not at its peak, it has declined even further.  The shit out right now is beyond weak--it's pathetic, there is absolutely no lyrical: abysmal.  I've recently started writing and now I pay extra special attention to the words used.  Music is not just to dance to, the original intent was to send a message.  The beat is a vehicle to drive the words past your conscious state.  After awhile you just don't hear the words, you unconsciously absorb them, digest them and then you are them in your head.  But not in reality, because while you're spending money you don't have trying to emulate what you see; these so-called MCs on TV are getting it for free.  They might not even be getting it at all, what they portray is often rented, or the IRS is calling--they are overextended.

Now here are some links to REAL HIP HOP.  Hip hop is an art form.  It's poetry.  It sends a message of life: the story of the soul evoked from the depth of the lyricist's being to connect all that listen in a circle of Truth, Honor, Originality and Realism.  It's only with these four components can we collectively raise our consciousness and transcend, not just pretend.

Expand your mind, open up your heart and just  listen. We can all relate, so let's all connect.

Thor Takeover: http://www.thortakeoverrecords.com/fr_home.cfm

Soundbwoikillaz: www.soundbwoikillaz.com

MagnumO: http://www.myspace.com/60683144

Hustle N. Flow 2.0 : http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/HUSTLE-N-FLOW-20/260232668459?ref=nf

Everybody comment and add your link: share your truth, share your vision, share your love.