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I am a writer of dark magical realism. All that is visible but rarely seen, all that is real but seems surreal, all that is dark yet radiates light.

Friday, August 13, 2010

I QUIT YOU!

Thought it's not the most economically prudent thing to do, sometimes the words: I QUIT! feel so good.

Steven Salter, the JetBlue Flight Attendant, is my hero; I especially liked the part when he grabbed two beers on his way out and activated the emergency chute and slid down: Gangsta.  Someone really should have had their phone recording all of the fun, the footage would have been hilarious.  For those unfamiliar with the story, the link is here:
 
JetBlue Flight Attendant Grabbed Two Beers Before Fleeing Onboard Scuffle

How rich: not mentioned in this story is that when the police came to arrest him, he was having sex.  It makes the story even better that on further consideration, he would like his job back.  I think they should rehire him.  He is good PR.  I'm sure all future passengers will adhere to the overhead luggage rule after this.

I thought I had some good quitting stories, but Steven--I am his bitch.  My best quitting story was when I had the boss sign my paycheck and then waited until lunch to bounce.  "I'll be back in a half an hour," I called over my shoulder on my way out.  Yea right, to have you sitting there looking stupid waiting for me was my plan.  Well, you always sat and looked stupid, but this time you did so waiting for me.

Ahahaha...I could just imagine the talk around the office, "Where is she? Is she coming back?"

Meanwhile, I was a few blocks away eating pizza with my friend and talking about how much I couldn't stand you.  Everyone else was cool, except for you.

Quitting a job without a backup is not smart, but I was lucky; after taking a break, I got a new job in exactly one day. 

Even if I didn't get employed right away, while eating ramen noodles and begging people for rent money, the imagined look on your face would have had me feeling rich.  Telling someone to kiss your ass: priceless.

4 comments:

  1. The story is beginning to change though. Was he a heterosexual and later became gay? His exit was indeed grand.

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  2. I believe he is gay but earlier stories might have gotten his sexual orientation wrong.

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  3. lol! Steven Salter is my hero too, that was liberating classic comedy!.........your version is just as classic.....as I was right there with you eating pizza....lol

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  4. Although I admire the bravery and balls of this guy, I do believe there are some (fed) ramifications for doing this. I hope not to severe because he provided me with entertainment for two hours as I read comment after comment on various sites. He gets my AWA. (Asshole of the Week Award)

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